if you learn and do not think, you will be bewildered.
how well do i understand it after the paper.
yes, my first paper's done.
and won't exceed B-, by my judgement.
but it has taught me such an important lesson.
some things can't be memorised.
got to think.
i thought after reading so much, i would have an easy paper with this. didn't realise, neh....
read too much, but do not think what i was reading, and in this exam case, if you do not think how this materials could be tested, how it would be presented, how everything links togehter, why was the course structured like that, what are the progressive steps that the lecturer intended.
All this provided insight.
and all these needs thinking.
haha how true.
let's right that mentality before my next paper.
:P
holiday
studying
and mugging for exams
and enjoying my naruto
ooo.
that's what i have been doing.
somehow it doesn't seems so stress for exams.
at least i am keeping myself from being too stressed.
realising how i absorb best is helping me to use my time to the best.
if i can't absorb anymore for 5 min, it signals a break
if that doesn't help,
it signals a longer break or a sleep
no point trying hard to continue
won't absorb.
they dun get processed in the brain.
that sounds like a lacklustre statement,
but i think it helps.
no point having good grades, but stressed out,
and forget everything learnt after exams.
knowledge builds on each other.
hee
(not forgotten after every exam, just try recalling what you still remember from previous exams, and they show you that those more lasting knowledge were from times when you were super absorbent, or super interested. The rest are gone aren't they, or at least not readily recalled.)
:)
carthasis.
that's the key.
purging the emotions
so i'm really ok.
dun worry.
no violent tendencies or bad karma whatever that means.
not sure why.
but you sure see that i'm not always locking my eyebrows now.
maybe cos i learnt to cope
maybe i've built up a better social support network
maybe ...
maybe...
whatever.
i'm really fine.
(once absolut recruitment is done) :P
(sam you know i always take your advice. i'll think about it. after exams. won't torture myself)
Thanks all.
yes zhisheng is probably stressed now...
on the eve of recruitment.
zhisheng is probably quite stressed.
but he's not showing it.
he dunno how to show it.
he feels that he's resigned to hard work.
nana suggested that it's called chronic stress.
yes it's no use grumbling. but then again this is his blog. let him release some bad energies.
he is feeling like a sucker. being free-ride and social loafed on.
that's just his feeling. not necessary the truth. cos he doesn't know the truth.
there's too little saliency of any actual work done, by his 18th comm, by his absolut comm.
yet he is working his ass off.
just a matter of opinion, but this guy would never say it to his programs people:
You better give me a satisfactory programs plan.
I am sore about what jannah's handling was like during FOC,
now i'm providing you the best environment i could give.
A solid recruitment preparation, get you the campers and facis, settle all admin for you people, even logistics, even car problem, even sponsorship.
And because you said you need to be clear about my objective, i searched the library thrice, for a few hours for books to help you people (instead of reading up for my tutorial or doing my report); i spend half my weekend reading up and looking for books in another library so I can give you an idea of what is appropriate for programs, when i have a lab report due in 3 days. 2 tutorials not read up yet. So now i'm as involved as anyone else in programs, in the actual planning of programs itself.
And i spend a whole fri working my ass from the moment i woke up to do up the recruitment booth, and then tonight, i spend my time for lab report again on recruitment instructions and booth items, so all of you are damn clear what to do. and everything possible i could think of is there. i will commit my 3 days to recruitment even. Not everyone can be there but i will be there as much as i can.
Ladies and gentlemen, if what i throw in is not example enough for you to follow. Tell me.
If what i invest in cannot motivate you to do your best, or at least dun give me rubbish, please tell me too.
I'm not exactly happy about it.
It's 3 weeks to exams. And i tell you i'm losing this week to absolut. I still have lots of readings undone too. just like any of you. And it prob wasn't due to me slacking.
I'm not happy when i see Gene studying like crazy for the past 2 weeks. I WANT TO study now too. I'm utterly concerned about my results and studies too. I'm trying my best to round things up in 18th comm, so nothing gets forgotten, or unchecked. as much as possible. i'm trying my best to improve and spearhead new things in the comm. and to help each cell out. I know i have expected this when i told you i will not fight with you for presidency. I will play a supporter. So dun let me regret my decision. dun make me think your effort dun justify my decision and the commitment i'm investing so much in now.
DUN MAKE ME A SUCKER.
And yes Absolut Programs. Same for you. Dun let my efforts seem like a joke with any lacklustre programs.
Ironically only one person in programs read my blog.
End.
- This probably will never be told to anyone. No one will disclose what i wrote here too. U will probably feel that this is a strong statement. A biased one even, one that fail to look at things on both sides, that fails to consider the situation in other people's shoes.
But like i say, this entry is about releasing bad energies. It's about facing my own fears. It's a emotional statement. A reflection of my feelings and worries.
So they ARE extreme thoughts.
Not something Zhisheng will prob ever say.
but let this be a carthasis for me. so that i can continue to work. and not be stressed out.
Two weeks to exams.
Jiayou.